Further Updates from March 2018
Replace Positivity with Optimism in 2020
The dictionary interpretation of Positivity....
‘A desirable or constructive quality or attribute’.
This is the reason the word ‘positive’ becomes a conundrum in benzo withdrawal and impossible to fulfil. We can’t be positive about anything but we can remain optimistic.
How can people stay positive with a constructive attitude when suffering some of the most appalling symptoms anybody should have to endure? I no longer use that word in benzo withdrawal, or as little as possible, as I always found it angered me. When really sick you don’t want to be told to keep ‘positive’ as that’s almost ridiculous you want to know how you can best help yourself, ease the worse symptoms and remain hopeful.
Mindset is important but that mindset perhaps should focus on knowledge that this situation is temporary and the symptoms will go and on proof of healing through the success of others. This gives us optimism which is a more appropriate word especially used alongside hope. We remain optimistic for recovery and hopeful that the outcome of our suffering will be full health.
The dictionary interpretation of Optimism....
‘Hopefulness and confidence about the future or the success of something.’
So let’s make Beating Benzos a place of optimism as the new year approaches. Keep it on track as somewhere we can be confident to find support for healing through love, friendship,
success and above all hope.
Christmas is a time of giving a time when presents are exchanged and it has been said that the present moment is called this because it’s a gift. We have nothing except this present moment, the past has gone and the future doesn’t exist. We may not like our own present moment but we still need to be grateful for it. We have nothing else so we have to let it come and let it go and see where it leads us without stressing or fighting it because it’s all we have. Everything is transient even the symptoms of benzo withdrawal, they are leading us to a better place.
Your presence is yours alone so pass through it, find something to be grateful for in it, seek an activity to enjoy in it and breathe because you are alive and coming to a new presence of health and happiness. We only have the present moment.
Let’s talk about time.
In benzo withdrawal we often hear,
‘How long is it going to last?’
‘When did you start feeling better?’
‘How long does acute last?’
‘When does sleep return,’ and so forth.....
Our lives are controlled by timelines even when not in withdrawal. We celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, and look forward to something happening at a date in the future. They even contribute to who we are such as a teenager, or a pensioner. The years slip by and get sorted into time frames in our minds according to past events. In other words time can almost limit our lives and our expectancies. They are an ‘intricate web of expectations, wishes, dreams, demands and longings’. By such and such an age we should be married, have had children, retired, fulfilled our dreams....they throw up numerous questions and only serve to feed the assumptions of when stuff should happen in our lives.
You may be able to see what I’m trying to say in the context of benzo withdrawal. We are all victims of time frames but it’s impossible to say how your own time frames are going to span out. You could be well tomorrow or five years from now, there is just no way of telling. Time stretches out in front of us and can be divided into segments such as the acute phase or protracted but the length of each can only be personal.
The same goes for symptoms. Asking how long such and such a symptom lasted for somebody else doesn’t inform us how long this symptom will last for us. Asking how long they took Benzos for isn’t telling us anything about our own recovery just reflecting an interest in somebody else’s story. Everything is anecdotal, nothing related to time tells us how our own recovery is going to happen or what our expectations should be.
So the point of all this is not to control your expectations by fitting them into somebody else’s time frames. Don’t be disappointed when time frames don’t meet your own expectations. You are going to get well and as is so often said if you give it ‘time’. Nobody will be able to tell you what that ‘time’ is going to be for you but you can go with your own recovery and watch it flow out before you or you can become upset when you feel it’s all taking too long.
I’ll stop there but the main point in this preamble is not to be controlled by time frames in benzo withdrawal or be disappointed when they don’t meet you expectations. Try and let it happen and all will be well in the time that is right for you. Love to everyone at this moment in time 😊❤️.
Recovery from long term us of Benzos is a difficult process which has now been happening for over 50 years since they were first heralded as ‘mothers little helper’ in the 1960s. All that time their damaging effects have been known when taken for longer than the mostly approved two to four weeks. It’s a situation that should never have happened. Over all that time sufferers and the more enlightened doctors, such a Heather Ashton, have attempted to find that miracle cure which would make recovery from Benzos easier. Sadly nothing has been shown to hurry the return of those GABA receptors in the body and brain and the only true healer has been time. Myself and thousands of others have recovered when we allow our healing pattern to unfold in the time that it takes for us and using the coping skills that help us.
My point in saying this is to please don’t blindly follow others who believe they’ve found that miracle cure for benzo withdrawal. If they had they would make millions! The amount of people still suffering should tell you this. You must research and come to your own conclusions because mistakes can be very costly not only in money terms but also in increased symptoms and recovery time. Along with others I’ve been influenced by what I read on the groups, bought numerous supplements, paid out for different internet courses and therapies and still had a very protracted withdrawal, probably made worse by my not at first accepting that there are no shortcuts.
Please let your own healing journey unfold naturally as it will and know that as of this date, November 26th 2019, no miracle cure for benzo withdrawal and recovery has yet been discovered. If you find something that you believe has helped you that’s fine but never persuade anybody else to try this as it could have disastrous effects. I know nobody would willingly do this when trying to support in a benzo group but sadly there are those out there in the world that will try and persuade you that they’ve found that miraculous cure for their own monetary gain. Be your own judge, advisor and advocate as only you can help yourself by gaining the knowledge I so often speak about. My love to everyone and may you soon find that place of peace and calm everyone longs for.
This morning I’m not going to tell you’re going to be well because that’s the natural outcome of stopping Benzos. Instead I’m going to tell you not to fight the process but to see it for what it is, a brain and body reverting to normal functioning. Every symptom and every moment of pain and confusion are a process of recovery. What makes this hard to appreciate is that in doing this it can make us feel so very ill and, in our lives up until now, feeling ill or having pain has meant that there is something wrong that needs treatment. In recovery from Benzos seeking further treatment for the symptoms can actually delay the process and even make it more difficult. This is so against all our thinking and beliefs to date and such a difficult concept to appreciate.
I’m not saying take nothing else, try nothing else but in doing so always investigate whether this is going to help you or not and, of course, if you have a medical illness that needs treatment then never stop this. I am
saying that you will recover and you don’t need to fight the symptoms just understand that they are bringing you to a better place. This is a challenging experience but every day you are moving closer to the grand finale and what a celebration that will
be! Try and accept and surrender, seek help as necessary but don’t fight and and take up a battle stance because you will exhaust yourself. The natural outcome of every symptom you suffer is healing.