Inspirational Thoughts

Lose Control

It’s very hard to get better if you insist that you remain in control. This leads to that futile search for more drugs, the elusive miracle supplement or herb and worst of all a return to those benzos or Z drugs. All this will only add further stress.

If you can give up trying to control those symptoms and let them play out for you your recovery may be faster and easier but, even if it isn’t, don’t lose faith in yourself and your body’s ability to heal. All the time you are tapering and then finally off you are recovering never forget this.

Of course if you have another medical condition some things may be inevitable and need dealing with but still learning coping skills and following healthy practices for diet and exercise gives your body and brain the best chance for early recovery.

Stay Strong, relinquish control, accept and surrender to the healing process that is happening for you.Love and Healing.

What Will Recovery Mean For You?

It’s a well known fact that keeping the brain in a more positive frame of mind can help recovery while bombarding it with anything triggering will ramp up anxiety and consequently symptoms can worsen. However, I appreciate that sometimes it is necessary to seek reassurance for the multitude of strange symptoms.

So What Will Recovery Mean for You? Here’s my list and please think of your own as well...

• The brain will be freed from the benzo fog and cognition can improve quite dramatically.
• Memory will improve and names will be easier to recall.
• Anxiety will become a thing of the past as you learn new ways to cope with this without a pill.
• Natural sleep will return which is more restorative than a drugged sleep.
• Your days will be freed from the need to take a pill to control your feelings and actions.
• You will have learnt a lot about yourself, how you react with other people and how to lead a better and more aware life.
• You will feel loads more compassion towards other people and be able to help in a more understanding way having suffered problems yourself.
• You will never blindly take any drug or even supplement without full research into the actions these have in your brain and body.
• As a consequence of the above you won’t allow yourself to be conditioned by any advertising you are subjected to in your country.
• You will feel and look younger!
• You may even live a longer life free from any threat of dementia.
• You will be able to socialise and go anywhere secure in your own mind and body.
• You will be stronger, happier, wiser, more alert, more confident...

You are doing this and are already amazingly strong for starting out on the journey to free yourself.

With Love

Tolerance v Anger

I’m sure many people will have experienced acute aggressive phases when recovering from benzos. You feel angry with everybody around you and may also hit out at those trying to support you.

When you have these feelings let time pass before you take any action as all too often once calm you can think more clearly and react in a more appropriate manner.

The emotions are in a turmoil and make you want to attack perhaps even those closest to you. Recognising this as yet another part of recovery is accepting the present situation and letting everything calm as it will.

Replace the anger with as much tolerance as you can muster! Breathe deeply if you feel hurt or wronged in any way, count slowly to ten and let the immediate reaction pass until you can think without emotion. All too often you realise that it was all a storm in a teacup and can be dealt with quietly and calmly.

The main message is not to do anything rashly and immediate which can cause you to do something you regret. Anger is part of recovery and you will learn to deal with it as symptoms calm over time.

Love and Healing

Unconscious Blocks to Healing

The body holds a lot of unconscious blocks to the healing process and here I’m listing just a few.

Benzo withdrawal activates the stress response and this response is far more intense than ‘normal’ anxiety due the chemical imbalances that Benzos have created. Changing some bad habits may help the recovery process be easier and less traumatic for you. All sorts of fears are going to surface as you make your way through but being ready for them and not overreacting can help them pass quickly.

Emotions (feelings that cause reactions)...frustration, overwhelm, irritation, anger, blame, helpless, hopeless, worry....

Limiting Beliefs (subconscious statements we hold about ourselves)...I can’t heal, I’m worthless, I’m not good enough, I’m a failure, there’s something wrong with me, I’m not important, I’m not lovable, I’m all alone, life is hard, I’m unsupported, nobody is as sick as me, I’m too old, I took Benzos for too long....

Bad Memories (unhappy or traumatic experiences from the past)...accidents, surgeries, being bullied, the death of family members and friends, a difficult childhood, physical or mental abuse, being polydrugged, hospital experiences, being disbelieved by doctors as well as family and friends....

Bad Habits (things you may do consciously or subconsciously)....saying “I can’t”, body checking for symptoms, focussing on what you don’t want i.e.”I don’t want to feel like this any more”, negative self talk and thoughts, searching for answers and asking why, eliminating more and more from your diet, overthinking, Googling, comparing yourself to others, complaining to others, looking for a pill every time there is a new symptom, blaming the outside world for your sickness, being scared of new illnesses, blaming your relationships, scared to be sociable or to go outside, the list here is endless and you could add your own...

We are all guilty of many of these things as they are a natural response to what we are going through. Recognising them for what they are will help a little and prevent getting stuck in the stress response.

We are the masters of our minds and only we can help change happen. Yes there are chemical imbalances, perhaps nutritional deficiencies, perhaps other illnesses, even life pressures but even here our reactions and mindset can help deal with them and not let them hinder progress. Love and peace of mind help create beneficial healing energy in our bodies.

Benzo withdrawal can be a difficult and confusing process and all sorts of emotions etc are going to surface but knowing this and being prepared is one way to keep as calm as possible while healing happens,

You will find peace, health and happiness again so let all these blocks to healing flow over you and don’t let them take hold because you are going to be ok.

I Asked Her if She Was OK...

I asked her if she was okay
and she said 'i'm fine I swear"
but when I looked into her eyes,
I clearly saw her struggles there.

She quickly looked away
and tried her best to smile
she said softly "I'll make it through this,
it's just taking me a while."

I knew she was hurting,
and I knew her pain was deep
but she felt the burden was hers
and hers alone to keep.

I reached out to her,
and our hands entwined
I said "I love you my friend.
So your burdens are also mine."

Symptoms are not You!

I came on to the group this morning to find several posts listing symptoms. Please remember you are not your symptoms but someone experiencing an illness that is way beyond our understanding. Whatever is happening in your body the real you still exists underneath it all and is waiting to emerge. Don't give these horror symptoms the time of day or you'll think you have just about every illness diagnosed and labelled by mankind.

Everybody experiences this differently. We may have permutations of the same symptoms but how we react to them and the amount of fear we attach to them is totally individual and dependent on genetics, personality, traumas in life and so forth. We support each other in the knowledge that we're individuals and whatever is happening in ourselves we have to give as much positive reassurance as we can to those alongside us in this.

Symptoms cause us to look inwards and even other people's symptoms cause us to look inwards to see if we have these as well! I know I've done this myself in the early days. In order to distract from what's going on in our bodies it's good to try and focus outwards, perhaps on all that we can be grateful for in life, on the beauty of nature, the warmth of the sunshine and so forth. I know and understand how difficult this is but I'm also aware that the symptoms we experience are transient and can be made more intense by focusing on them.

With lots of positive input, gentle reassurance and love the brain is helped to readjust and return to normal functioning. In the meantime it's going to throw up numerous, inexplicable symptoms as it attempts to get all the neural pathways functioning normally again. It can be a nightmare and a test of endurance for the strongest of us but it can also be helped along the way by acceptance and not fighting this rebuilding process. When these pathways have been firmly established and we realise full health again then life will be better than we can imagine.

My Love to you all and may all your symptoms fade away to reveal the new you as quickly as possible.

Recovery Will Bloom

Please do not feel as though your symptoms are never going to get better or go away. Remember that living things take time to grow, especially nerves and gaba receptors! If you plant bulbs in the winter, you cannot see them frozen beneath the soil. But in time, when the weather changes, and Spring arrives, the miracle of life emerges from the icy ground.

The same will happen inside your body, gaba receptors are up regulating, your brain is busy making chemical changes and in time you will feel improvements, and in due time full recovery will be in bloom. Give yourself permission to stop worrying, and rest in your body’s amazing ability to heal itself.

Courage

Worry and thoughts of despair are are very normal on this journey. But we must learn to take control of them when they threaten our peace of mind and well being. Most things we fear or worry about never come to pass! The best weapon we have is keeping our attitude as positive and hopeful as possible. Quickly putting to rest thoughts of doom, or "what if's" by switching them out with thoughts of the opposite are a powerful way we can give ourselves peace. Allowing ourselves to be at rest with the process of recovery by accepting that it will take time, it may be very rough for a while, but that it will end, will give us strength to keep going, healing will come! Blessings to all!!

Protracted Withdrawl

Perhaps this is more for those of us that are in a protracted withdrawal. It's impossible to believe that recovery can take so long for just a few of us stuck in a roller coaster of healing many months or even years after stopping benzos. However, even us protracted people win through in the end. The body and brain take as long as they need to bring us back to homeostasis and a happy life again. We must keep going, keep believing in full recovery however far from that day we finally ceased the poison.

- Rosalind

This is Temporary

No matter where you are or how you are feeling, this is temporary! Symptoms will come and go like annoying party guests who want to be the center of attention, but eventually they will leave for good and peace will come again, the mess they made will be cleaned up and forgotten. Life will go on and you will be free again! Until then, do your best to ignore them, focus on taking good care of yourself, and don't listen to the fear provoking thoughts they call out to you. Distraction is your best friend. Use positive uplifting things. Listen to beautiful music, walk if you can outside, watch funny movies, read if you can. Whatever you can do to keep going. Healing will happen! ~Blessings!

- Carl

By Rosalind

This is healing as it's from all the suffering we may have experienced over the months maybe years that we come to find out just who we are.

Never regret what you've been through if at all possible. Always try and see it as a learning experience that will help you to understand so much more about yourself and deal with any crisis in your future life with a calmness and strength not accessible to you before.

I'm reaching this place now. I've written in my Blog about how the world seems a very different place to me now post benzos, bigger, brighter more controversial but it's an amazing world to come back to. Keep going, keep believing and you will move from the middle of nowhere into a happier and more rewarding life than you've ever experienced while on the brain altering chemicals of benzos. Love and peace to everyone.

By Cari

While on the this journey you may encounter periods of feeling as if you are walking blindly into the dark. Symptoms may flare up and cause you to feel intense fear and depression. Well meaning friends or loved ones may even encourage you to get back on your "meds", or take another kind of psychotropic drug. Please do not fall into that! This is rough, it can be dark, but it does not mean you are not getting anywhere! You must remember that your central nervous system is so delicate and it is trying to repair the temporary damage created by these drugs to begin with. You cannot see what is around the corner or inside the next moments in time. If this is happening to you understand you cannot fix or change things by taking another pill or suppliment. Not to say some supplements may help ease your pain, but they may also make it worse. Try complimentary treatments etc if you think it may help you, but remember that your not normal right now so what would normally be helpful may also be a triggor. In the beginning i tried everything, for me nothing has helped in the big scheme of everything but time! It is always advisable to have your labs done, make sure you not deficient in anything. Eat clean healthy food as that is vital for nerve regeneration and overall health. You will be well, you really are going to be alright!!!~ Blessings and healing!!

By Cari

Feelings of being overwhelmed and discouraged are very normal during a wave, it is nothing to feel bad about. Just don't panic, and remember that you are not always going to be like this! Although you may be exhausted and feel like you will never heal, as if you are the one person who won't ever get better, that is just not true, your body is on a different time schedule from others! I have seen people who were on benzos for years heal within a few months, while I was only on them for 6 months and have been dealing with wd for months and months. There is just no figuring out the reasons of why that is. But you are going to get there, just get through today, and then tomorrow, pretty soon you will be on solid ground! Meanwhile, just try to find ways to cope. Do not isolate yourself, keep trying to do small things, watch uplifting movies, whatever itvis that brings you some positivity and relief. Mostly be kind to yourself, it is not your fault you are sick! Let others help you when they offer. Try to find peace within your struggle, try to be encouraged because you are going to make it !!! ~ Blessings, healing, and hope to you!

By Cari Garrison

Keep climbing, you can do it! If symptoms flare up again, try to ignore them and remember, if they went away once they will again. For some it is may be helpful to write down a journal of their symptoms so that they can remember and see improvements. Every step you take, day after day you are going to get there! Even when symptoms are at their worst, healing is happening! Try to take comfort in this, and reassure yourself as this is a necessary process for your brain to right itself and for your chemistry to normalize! You are getting better with each passing day!!! ~Blessings

By Doug Doores

I haven't posted in awhile. Life has been a struggle for me. So I wanted to post something positive for those (like myself) that needs a reminder. We will heal!